Month: May 2016

You want to secede? Be my guest.

I have lived in Texas for 10 years. Admittedly, I know some people who moved here much more recently that have embraced the Lone Star State. They love the winters and likely didn’t have a good Tex-Mex restaurant in their old hometown. I do hear a few comments about how friendly people are down here. While I’m happy for those folks, I just don’t get it.

A few days ago, I met a lady from my hometown of Chicago at a grocery store in lovely Flower Mound, TX. We talked about our mutual love of the Cubs and raved about how well they’re playing. Then, we turned to the inevitable subject of whether we miss Chicago. We both agreed that Chicago is a wonderful city, and that we miss the people, the food, and our beloved baseball team. She moved here five years ago to be closer to her daughter. I asked if she feels like a Texan. “No, I will never be a Texan. In fact, I’ll never catch myself saying y’all. I still say you guys.”

I’ve been here twice as long as she has, and I don’t consider myself a Texan. I never will. I know what you’re thinking. “Why don’t you just move your ass out of here, you damn Yankee?” Well, I can’t say it hasn’t been discussed, but financially it isn’t an option. Let me explain why I feel the way I do.

I’ll get to politics, since that’s what this blog is all about, but before I do, allow me to talk about the obsession some people have with this state. Every day, my son recites two pledges. One to the United States and one to the state of Texas. He then heads into his Texas History class. I may be wrong, but I don’t know of any other state that has its own pledge and history class. It seems to me that the Pledge of Allegiance to the United States of America and United States History includes Texas, right? I know plenty of people in this state would love to see Texas become an independent country, but it hasn’t happened yet.

“Native Texan”. You see a lot of those bumper stickers on a lot of pickup trucks around here. Again, I don’t recall seeing “Native Virginian” or “Native Oregonian” when I’ve visited those states. I guess I can’t blame them be being proud, but there’s an ideology that goes along with that boast that makes me, shall we say, uncomfortable.

More often than not, the people with that bumper sticker have other bumper stickers. One you won’t see is “Hillary 2016”, but you will see plenty of NRA or Trump stickers. The majority of folks who are native Texans are also native Republicans. These are the people who repeatedly vote for crooks like Greg Abbott, Dan Patrick and our esteemed Attorney General, Ken Paxton. He would be the guy facing federal securities fraud charges.

They’re also the folks who proudly fly the Texas state flag, and in some cases the confederate flag, from their trucks. They hug their guns before going to sleep and are convinced they might need those guns when President Obama invades Dallas.

They consider themselves among the most patriotic Americans you’ll find, but many would like nothing more than to see Texas secede from the Union. There’s a lady who works at a grocery store across the street from our house. She has two bumper stickers on her minivan. One reads “Secede”, while the other is “Not a liberal!”. I’m sure that didn’t stop her from paying tribute to our fallen troops on Memorial Day, and she’ll likely love those fireworks on July 4.

The biggest reason I’m no fan of Texas is the food. The pizza sucks, you can’t find a good hot dog down here and those native Texans don’t even know what Italian Beef is. That said, if Portillo’s ever opens down here, it might make everything I’ve just written moot.

Speaking of Memorial Day

My father served in Europe during World War 2. He was a weapons repair specialist. It’s funny. When I was a kid, I used to give him a hard time about watching war movies because he had lived it. So, what did I watch today? A four-hour long documentary about World War 2.

He made it home from the war in good shape, but many of his friends didn’t. I despise war, as most normal people do, but I have great respect for those who served or currently serve. They deserve our sincere gratitude.

By the way, my oldest brother, Mark, served in the Navy many moons ago. He didn’t see any action, but he looked pretty good in his uniform.

Dear Bernie, get out!

Let me preface my comments by saying I have a great deal of respect for Senator Sanders, as well as many of his supporters. Let’s be honest. We have a lot in common. All of us want the tremendous dangers of climate change to be seriously dealt with. We also want abortion rights to continue, the Supreme Court to be filled with progressive judges for generations to come, the LGBT community to no longer fear being terrorized by bigots, and campaign finance reform. It’s all really good stuff! Why anyone who considers themselves a “progressive” would vote against their own interests is beyond me, and I’m a fairly smart guy.

In a recent poll, 17% of Sanders supporters say they would vote for Trump over Clinton. Are these people just stupid, or is there something wrong with their brains that keeps them from thinking rationally? Let me be clear. Donald Trump is the most reprehensible Presidential candidate I’ve seen in my lifetime. He hates Hispanics, Women, Immigrants, poor people and taxes. I know. We all hate taxes, but we still have to pay our share. It’s the price of living in a democracy. The Trumpster sees himself as being above the average schmo and sees no need to pay anything, let alone his fair share.

There will be plenty of time to list all the things wrong with Trump. I would likely have to blog every day until the election to touch on everything. For now, I’ll speak in generalities. Donald Trump is a bad man. Again, I wonder. Why would anyone who believes in progressive causes vote for a guy who will destroy all that we hold dear? The answer, at least in my mind, is this. Sanders supporters, many of whom have never participated in anything political before, are obnoxious sore losers. Ok, not all of them, but many of them are like spoiled children who pout until they get their way. Well, guess what, Sanderistas? You ain’t getting your way.

I use this sports analogy. Imagine, if you will, playing 2-on-2 basketball. Your teammate nails a lovely shot from the top of the key, but you’re pissed because you were wide open. Instead of patting your teammate on the back, you become so mad that you decide to join the other team. It’s silly, right? Welcome to the warped minds of Bernie Sanders supporters who would rather vote for hell than something a lot closer to heaven.

Oh, how the Texas GOP misses the good, old days!

The Texas Republican Party recently held their state convention right here in Dallas. Fortunately, I avoided the city during that time, although I’m sure many of my Flower Mound neighbors made their way to the convention, like the good sheep that they are.

Republicans love to shoot down any claims that they are a racist, homophobic, gun-hugging group of people. Their platform would say otherwise. Allow me to fill you in on a few things the Texas GOP believes.

I’ll begin with my favorite, which must of come as a shock to many Texas. Thanks to a grammatical error, it seems a good percentage of them enjoy an alternative lifestyle.

• Homosexuality is a chosen behavior that is contrary to the fundamental unchanging truths that has been ordained by God in the Bible, recognized by our nations founders, and shared by the majority of Texans. (Am I the only one shocked by this? I guess I’m in the minority in more ways than one?
• Of course there’s a plank that bitches about having bathrooms for the Transgender community. In fact, that’s one of several anti-LGBT planks in the platform. People fear what they can’t understand. I guess that’s why most Texas Republicans fear science.
• Another new plank calls for the state to defy the U.S. Supreme Court’s June 2015 ruling in favor of nationwide marriage equality, while others seek to preserve the right of businesses to turn away same-sex couples based on religious beliefs.
• They approved a plank calling for all abortions to be made illegal in our lovely state. No stunner, there.
• They are in favor of the repeal of the 17th Amendment and the appointment of United States Senators by state legislatures.
• The Texas GOP would like to eliminate environmentalism that obstructs legitimate business interests and private property use, including the regulatory taking of property by governmental agencies.

None of these are particularly surprising. There are plenty of other planks that continue to reveal just how cuckoo these folks are. I will say this. They decided not to secede from the United States. Better luck next time.

Bottom line…while Democrats talk about inclusion and pulling people into the proverbial tent, Republicans talk about bigotry and keeping people out. If only they could go back in time to 1955 when racism was more in fashion.

Update: There is hope!

Mary Lou Bruner, the whack job I talked about in my last post, lost her Republican primary runoff election for the Texas State Board of Education to a guy named Kevin Ellis! Admittedly, I don’t know much about Ellis, but unless he’s had a lobotomy, he can’t be nearly as bad as Bruner.

Congrats, Texas Republicans. You got one right! It just goes to show. Even a blind squirrel finds a nut once in a while.

That’s all for now. As always, your thoughts, suggestions and comments are welcome, and yes, I do realize I basically said the same thing three different ways.

 

Your rubber room is waiting

For those of you who don’t live in Texas, please allow me to introduce you to Mary Lou Bruner. She’s a retired teacher and counselor, who is likely on her way to joining the Texas State Board of Education. You might think her experience will bode well for the students of this state, and you’d be wrong. Why? Well, Ms. Bruner is absolutely nuts. Not only that, she’s the poster child for right-wing hatred, homophobia and straight up insanity.

Here are some examples of what Mary Lou believes, and remember, she will very likely play a lead role in determining what students in Texas read in textbooks.

She believes:

President Obama was a drug-addicted gay prostitute. Bruner insists the President is a Muslim, and she’s referred to him as “Ahab the Arab”.

Obamacare is part of a United Nations plot to trim the U.S. population by as many as 200 million people.

Climate change is not only a hoax, but one created by Karl Marx.

School shootings are happening in the United States because kids are being taught evolution.

Dinosaurs not only roamed the earth with humans, but there were little baby dinos on Noah’s Ark. I bet they were precious.

The USA should ban Islam and block all immigration from Muslim countries. After all, Islam is trying to conquer Merica.

Finally, here’s my favorite: Pre-K is designed to confuse young children about sexuality, and eventually turn them gay.

I’m not making any of this up. It’s sadly all true. What’s worse, she’ll inherit a great deal of educational influence once she takes her spot on the Board. People wonder why I’m not a huge fan of living in Texas. Well, I miss living in a place where someone like Bruner would be laughed at, not elected.

This woman is frightening. She should be committed and hidden away from sensible people, not thrust into a position of power. I don’t dislike people just because they share different political believes than I, but I despise this woman.

My wife is a Kindergarten teacher. In fact, she’s one of the most outstanding teachers I’ve ever been married to. Seriously, her students are lucky to have her in their lives. At the end of every school year, parents tell my wife how her warmth and caring changed their child’s view of school. She makes me incredibly proud on a daily basis.

It makes both of us sick to our stomachs that Bruner may have a say in what my wife is expected to teach. Education should be based on facts, not radical, conspiracy-fueled hate speech.

Ms. Bruner, if you had any decency at all, you would ride off into the sunset, but you won’t because you don’t. I hope you have nightmares of gay Pre-K kiddies riding their pet dinosaur, while quoting Marx and crying because the polar ice caps are melting.

Blame it on Canada!

The Rangers beat the Blue Jays Sunday afternoon, but what will be remembered about the game is the fight between the two teams. Specifically, one punch delivered by Roughned Odor to the chin of Jose Bautista. The Rangers have craved revenge ever since Bautista’s bat flip after his home run knocked Jeff Bannister’s bunch out of the playoffs last season.

While I think it’s silly to claim revenge, considering a heartbreaking, season-ending epic playoff meltdown runs rings around one regular season win in May, that’s not what caught my interest.

While the two teams finally retreated to their respective dugouts, the faithful at Rangers Ballpark started chanting, “U.S.A., U.S.A!”. Suddenly, this brawl between a second baseman from Venezuela and a right fielder from the Dominican Republic turned into a Trump rally. I’m sure that chant really pissed off the ONE Canadian player the Blue Jays have on their roster.

I’ve tried hard but I can’t imagine that chant happening in any other major league ballpark. A fight is a fight, and I understand why the Rangers aren’t too fond of the Blue Jays, but after today, I wouldn’t be surprised in there’s a movement among fans to build a wall across Niagara Falls.

What’s next?

You won’t believe what’s in the Texas GOP’s platform. Well, actually you will. After all, it’s Texas.

Welcome to Straight Out of Left Field. I have been posting my liberal thoughts on Facebook for several years. A few have strongly suggested that I begin this blog, and I’m excited to launch. Let me briefly tell you what this blog is all about.

I am a staunch and proud Democrat living in Flower Mound, Texas, one of the most conservative burbs you’ll find. The folks are nice here, but the vast majority of them fit a certain stereotype. The women are almost all blondes, natural or not, and drive SUVs that are bigger than they really need, while the men wheel around in pickup trucks with the obligatory NRA sticker on the rear windshield. Yep, they’re right out of central casting.

This blog will talk about politics. Local, State and National politics. As the name, Straight Our of Left Field, suggests, there might even be a bit of baseball talk, but only about my beloved Cubs. With all that said, I ask that you enjoy, and please share your thoughts.

Thank you Mr. President

The Obama administration will direct schools to allow Transgender students to use the bathroom they identify with. Isn’t it wonderful to have a President who believes in the rights and dignity of every American? This could have an impact on the environment because of the amount of smoke coming from the ears of right-wingers. You know these people. They’re the folks who hide behind the Bible to advance their hateful and divisive agenda.

I know what some will say. “Why can’t this guy just work with Congress instead of inflicting his will on us? He’s making it hard for us to take our country back…to the fifties.” Well, when it comes to doing anything important, Republicans in Congress would have to speed up to catch a sloth with a twisted ankle. No, I don’t know if sloths really have ankles, but I’ll look into it.

I don’t personally know any Transgender people, but my son does. He goes to school with a young lady who has shown tremendous courage by coming out in the middle of high school. As you might expect, students at Flower Mound High School tend to lean to the right. I’m sure she has taken her fair share of snide comments and dirty looks, but not from my son. He has befriended her, while treating her as just another student. I’m proud of him.

So, what’s next?

There’s so much to talk about. It’s very hard to narrow it down, but there happens to be a lovely woman named Mary Lou Bruner who is running for the Texas Board of Education. She’s a Republican, so she’ll almost definitely win. This woman is also a certified loony. In fact, she belongs in a room with padded walls and no access to sharp objects. I’ll tell you why in the next edition of Straight Out of Left Field.